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Adv. Meerza Zaheer, Mediator,

Senior Associate (Operations), SoftSettle Support

Last one year I have been rigorously involved in the awareness programmes in the venues facilitated by the Residential Associations of different corporations. During my presentations I used to get opportunities to clear some of the doubts of the audience.

The first and most recurring myth that have nursed by most of the women in the society is about the domination of men in the process of mediation and disadvantages of the women in mediation. But the truth is that women can often obtain a better result in mediation than they can in court, because the mediation process allows separating spouses to negotiate an agreement that consider non-legal factors. A woman is free to stop the mediation or refuse to sign an agreement that seems unfair to her.

Another interesting myth that the audience keep in their mind is that the longer period of the process of mediation. Even a Dick and Harry knows that mediation challenges litigation mainly in respect of time and expenses. Mediation takes less time than litigating a divorce.

Another concern among the legal professionals is that lawyers have no place in mediation. Lawyers who understand and support mediation can help mediating spouses in several ways such as by informing them of their legal rights and options, by coaching the parties through the negotiation, by coming up with creative settlement ideas, by preparing the necessary divorce paperwork once an agreement is signed or even they can act as the counsels for the parties in the respective mediation processes. Consulting lawyers can charge a reasonable hourly fee and don’t require a large retainer.

The ironical myth loops around keeping the lawyers away from the Mediation process. How can it be possible? Mediation is unique in that parties are free to make their own decisions, which to an outsider may be good or bad, financially favourable or unfavourable.   The rules of divorce are controlled by statutes and case law as applied to the facts of the case. Having knowledge of the rules is essential to reach an ultimate resolution, not because we are bound to follow the law, but because without it there is no way to make an informed decision. Only a matrimonial practitioner can provide a client this information.  Neither the Internet, a neighbour, nor a friend is a substitute for information from a reputable source.

Other myth about mediation is that in mediation, the mediator is just like a judge in the trial proceedings and he decides what is fair. But it is not true. Unlike a judge or an arbitrator, a mediator has no power to make decisions for the divorcing spouses. The mediator’s job is to facilitate the spouses negotiate an agreement that each of them considers fair enough to accept.

Mediation is a fantastic process that allows parties to craft a resolution that is appropriate and unique to the specific facts of their case and their family.  It allows for creativity and out of the box thinking, and often the resulting agreement may be far outside the narrow parameters that the law confines a court to.  Even the most factually challenging matters and those with parties with strong personalities can be resolved in mediation. That being said, there are many different mediation myths and misconceptions that are simply not true. This is why it is crucial to seek information about how the mediation process works. Without a full disclosure of information, mediation is bound to fail or result in a one-sided resolution. MEDIATOR AFFAIR is designed in such a way so as to provide more space for information gathering ultimately leading to attain equity & justice.

So long as the mediation gets an acceptance among the public and its dominance over court litigation, there may be an automatic tendency for propagating myths about mediation